It strikes me that we are all very capable of complaining–about our bosses, our co-workers, our subordinates. We seem to have a knack for pointing out the deficiencies of those who surround us at work and in life. Perhaps our own culture inspires us to look elsewhere for the root of our problems–and I am not denying that there are situations where someone at work has shown us less respect than we deserve or has disregarded our own genius. I wonder, however, if there are other ways to look at things.
Recently I read a wonderful book that I highly recommend, Switch: How to Change Things When Change Is Hard. This books focuses on change and practical ways to achieve it–breaking down the steps and guiding us through what change entails. The authors cite several studies indicating that we are very lousy at self-evaluation–which may make change hard! Look in the mirror–we excel at overestimating our own capacity!!! Did you know that your friends are much more accurate in predicting if you are picking the “right” romantic partner? Is it possible that you bring this weakness to work when complaining about others? Could it be that you have faults that have prevented you from showing up as the best co-worker?
So I invite you to step outside your shoes today–when you look at the person who is irritating you for whatever reason, think about what that person is seeing in you. Would she want something from you that you have perhaps not been able to give or could change?
If you are having trouble, consider calling a coach…there is real value in having another person look at us and challenge us to embrace change that will move us away from just complaining!
Life is Amazing! Live well
Anna Grassini